ImNoBetterThanU

Busyness.. Complexity... Honestly this list could go on and on...      We need to just simplify. How is it that we get so caught up in things that we allow our souls to get so cluttered. Makes me think of a quote from the movie The Brothers Bloom where one of the characters told the other she believed he was constipated in his soul. Too graphic for you? So sorry...welcome to my blog. #keepinitreal Public Service Announcement: I also do not condone the watching of the aforementioned movie if you are easily offended HA!      So for me in 2017 I want to simplify; allowing the simple things to keep me holding on. Life will be much easier. With all the clutter, the "constipation", it causes unnecessary stress and tension that can lead to a feeling of being lost. For me, it will also cause me to (figuratively) hold on to things so tightly that eventually I will lose my grip and free fall. Thus falling into a state in which further causes confusion an...

     So today on this Memorial Day of 2015 when we honor our fallen troops of past and the men and women currently serving our country to protect our freedom I felt led to open the blog, blow off the dust, and write a new post.      Today I exercised my great freedom by participating in  the Murph Challenge . I did not really have a strong desire to do so, but knowing all the sacrifices made by the aforementioned men and women I felt I could endure some suck in honor of them. More specifically Lt. Michael P. Murphy endured far more than I have in my entire life so it only felt right. His story can be read here .      I can also say that as hectic a day as I have had, awakening at 5:30 this morning and just now getting to a point where I can sit an relax (now 5:25 pm) this was sincerely the most amazing and memorable Memorial Day I can remember in all of the 39 times I have revolved around the sun. Good exercise, good friends (see bel...

     Why am I so stubborn?      I approached the witness stand and began to tell my side of the story. The more I talk the more you would think I was the defendant rather than a witness. The trial went on for a lengthy time, so long in fact we eventually took recess for a lunch break. Upon return from lunch I got back on the witness stand where the attorney (whom I like to call the accuser) continued to barrage me with accusations. I continued to defend myself...how did this happen where I was converted from a witness to the defendant?      It was a long and emotional day as one can imagine. Then to top things off at the end of the day the judge stated he was overruling everything I had said because he objected! WHAT! Are you kidding me?      I am sure you can all relate with how frustrated I must have felt. Asking myself why I even had to spend an entire day at court. Feeling as though I had wasted an entire day of...

     The removal of weeds within my soul is a painful thing, but ever so worth the freedom it brings and the healing that follows. Progressive sanctification is such a beautiful thing. There are many different ways people reference this work of the Lord. The "peeling of layers like an onion" and "softening the heart and removing scar tissue" to name a couple; in this case I am using the analogy of removing weeds from our lives. Just as in the physical realm when you takeover a rental property that was not maintained you will not eliminate all  weeds in one attempt without further damaging the lawn. My soul was full of overgrown weeds and other garbage because rather than stewarding my body, soul, and Spirit as a gift I treated them all more like a rental property for a number of years. In the same way God will not remove every weed in our life at once whereas we would likely not survive such an action from such a glorious being. He will remove som...

     Last night at VII  Pastor Stephen spoke on deceit. A powerful message...      I would like to think of myself as a man of integrity and actually would pride myself on my integrity. However, as you can likely tell from my recent posts I have struggled with some sin over the last few months. I rationalized my blogging about my struggles as my "confession". The thing was I was being disobedient whereas I clearly heard God telling me to go to pastoral leadership to confess these things. I had avoided it by going to other leaders in the church. Well today I finally did it! I actually confessed it all to two pastors and last night to other leadership in the church and I have to tell you James 5:16 is in full effect. I am hundreds of pounds lighter. In fact just two hours before I began writing this someone at church came up and said, "you look great!". He then went on to tell me he could tell something was not right in my heart an...

      Many decisions we make have an eternal impact upon our lives and the lives of our children (our legacy) whether good or bad. "We will reap what we sow" - Galatians 6:7b " for I the Lord your God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children to the third and the fourth generation of those who hate me," - Exodus 20:5b      Making a decision is a cognitive process which results in a choice.  Progression in life (maturity and growth) is directly correlated with our daily choices. Our choices also control our attitudes which impacts our behaviors. Our choices also impact those in our lives. I have just gone through a season of making poor choices. Falling victim to temptation in areas I had previously conquered. Self condemnation is an easy thing to fall victim of after these setbacks, as well as guilt of how we affected others as a result of our sin. I myself was falling into both pits when God, ...

     God's forgiveness is absolute; we are the ones that struggle with forgiveness (both giving and receiving). Until you truly believe this in your heart you can not experience true freedom from your past. It is much easier to believe this in your mind than to allow that belief to travel eighteen inches to the heart.      What I am about to share with you, many of you know about my past...most of you do not. This part of my life goes back to early 2004. This was a time when I was working for a publication company during the week and working in a friends bar on the weekends. At this time I was living a life of total immorality. I was drunk every weekend (fringe benefit of being a bartender), I was living in promiscuity, smoking one to two packs of cigarettes a day, and the occasional joint would top things off. I was a poor steward of relationships in my life (both family and friends), I was a poor steward of money,...

The title of this post is such a common phrase used in our society. Yet I believe that it is used out of context most of the time. We (myself included) make that statement as though we have transformed into this new person and progressed beyond whatever bondage, oppression, and sin was previously in our lives. It implies that we ourselves have done something positive in our own effort to get past all the junk from our past and be a better person. This is all wrong! It should not be "who I have become" but rather "becoming who I am". Although it is a process that we must go through it is more about us experiencing healing in our lives (physical, emotional, mental, etc.) that leads to the progressive sanctification of becoming who God intended us to be all along. The person He had in mind when he so carefully designed us down to every minute detail. It is truly about total surrender and submission to His will. We live in a fallen world. We make mistakes. Circum...

Do you have a Jericho in your life?      Of course you do, we all do. The key to defeating your Jericho is to complete all seven laps! What would have happened if Joshua and the Israelites had not completed all seven laps around their Jericho? They would have not only failed to defeat the city, but would have been the laughing stock of the world at that time. I mean who would march around a city led by the band trying to defeat their enemy? However, since they chose to be obedient to the commands of God they have a story of victory that is known worldwide and has endured for centuries.      With this new year upon us I challenge and encourage you to be diligent and intentional with all that you do. If you walk away with anything from any post I have ever written please let the following two points sink in. Through radical obedience and patient endurance our actions show our faith and God will work miracles in our life.  Be intenti...

This morning I went to the car wash to remove from the hood of my car the unpleasantly large gift left by what was apparently a large flock of birds. TMI? Sorry. Anyway...while I was using the high pressure thrust of the water to remove the aforementioned aerodynamic obstructions from my vehicle the Lord was showing me something about our own lives. As I washed the dirt and filth away I noticed several new blemishes from chips, to scratches, and scrapes in numerous areas. Whereas my initial reaction was one of lackluster emotions including frustration, disappointment, maybe even a dash of anger I quickly stopped to ask myself why. Take every thought captive... I know, I know. Some of you are now thinking that I have gone super-spiritual. Hear me out. What good does it do to have any negative emotions about something so minor? I get it, you pay tens of thousands of dollars for something and we are told to be good stewards of what God blesses us wi...

As this Thanksgiving day is rapidly coming to a close I have been reflecting on the last year. It has been the most amazing year of my entire life. The physical and emotional healing that God has done in my life would have previously been unimaginable had you asked me one year ago. The emotional, psychological, mental, spiritual, and yes even physical growth I have experienced over the last year has been miraculous as you consider where I have been in life. At this point in my life I could give you a long list of current circumstances in my life that would have had me stressed, worried, angry, and bitter (just to name a few) just twelve months ago. In fact, my overall circumstances in life were much better than they currently are and I still allowed many of the aforementioned emotions and feelings to control my life at this time last year. However, today I can say I am joyful and at peace with myself and my life. I am also being used daily to impact peoples...

Sometimes I feel that individuals keep trying to fix something without knowing the root cause of the problem. I know for a fact that I have done this myself on many occasions and as a human on this earth will likely fall victim to this very act again. For, example a lack of feelings of self-worth, belonging, [ insert your own personal struggle here ], etc. Below is a great example found in an excerpt from a sermon taught by Matt Chandler of The Village Church . "Recovering sight is what Jesus is going to bring in the gospel. I don't know that you can get through life without being hurt and wounded by something. You know, daddy didn't hug you well enough. And it's really not your daddy's fault. Dr. Hannah was here this week for a pastor's conference. He told a great story about his wife when she was sixteen—mowed the lawn, trying to surprise her daddy, and she left this one little strip undone. And when her daddy got home, he re-mowed the whole lawn. But he wa...

I want to preface this post by stating that last Tuesday was a ministry night for leaders and emergin leaders within the church. During that time Alan Smith  had an amazing word for me that spoke directly to my heart at just the right time in my life. It gave me a new perspective on life in general and has been yet another turning point in my life that I can add to all the great advances that are occurring in my life over the last couple of years.  Memorial Day Weekend, this used to be one of my favorite weekends because there were plenty of parties. For me this weekend consisted of ingesting drugs, alcohol, and likely times of being sexually immoral...oftentimes with multiple partners (or the same numerous times). Sounds fun right? Wrong!  None of it was ever enough. Tuesday (if I even made it in that day) I would drag myself into work feeling as though Mike Tyson had his way with me in the ring. All for what? To go out again Tuesday night after wo...

Well, I know it has been a long time since I have posted anything here and for that I apologize. In our society, it is quite common that we get so caught up in our day to day routine that we rarely have a moment when we do not have some "important" matter inundating our minds. I too fell victim to this. The good news is that I am now moving beyond that point! I am beginning a new season in my life. I just auspiciously moved and I am quickly getting settled into my new place. In addition to this, a lot has happened in my life over the last two and half years and I can honestly say that I am in a better place and doing better as a person than I have in well over a decade. I am looking to get back to writing more often and sharing my thoughts with you all by 'Typing Out Loud'. I hope I have not lost all my readers and hope I can grow larger whereas I feel this is a tool that I am to use to reach out to others and impact my friends, ac...

Lies, deceit, secrets, deception... I think we can all agree that none of the aforementioned are going to lead to any positive progression in our lives. Yet we are human and our fleshiness will lead us all there at some point in our life. The key is moving on past it; not allowing those times to drag you down. You must also make a choice to turn your life around (repent) and stop those actions. You must realize that regardless of what you have done in the past you can be free and live the life you were designed to live. Oftentimes people believe that because of their past that they can never be a part of any kind of ministry or make a positive difference in the lives of those around them that they come in contact with. That is a complete and total lie. In biblical historical times David is viewed as one of the greatest men of his time; and throughout all of history to this day. However, go read 2 Samuel 11-12 . A mighty man of God, a...

So the last month I had been under severe attack and it was a very difficult time for me to remain positive and optimistic. Well, that time is over! Last and first of year offerings to Him and my first fruit offerings through denying and devoting ( fasting ) are already paying off in dividends! Whereas it was much more than I had anticipated or ever previously given up; I know that as a result I will experience a great breakthrough in an area(s) of my life as a result of my obedience . The  First Conference has been incredible this far and I look forward to the remainder of it. I wish I could take the next three days off just to focus on the devotional and  The Word in preparation for the message. When pressing into Him over the last three days I am encouraged to further my actions with great fervor.

Let me start by telling any and all readers happy new year. So December was a truly rocky month for me emotionally, spiritually, physically, psychologically, and physiologically. What? You think I am a mess? Well, we all are if you want to be honest with yourself. One thing I can say is that over the last year I have made huge strides to being more healthy in all the aforementioned areas and I am. However, life is a continual process of progressive sanctification and I am aware of that. I know that at this time last year and especially just 18 months ago I was doing drugs, getting drunk often, and very promiscuous to top it all off. Well, thankfully I can say those  days are behind me, but now time to work on resolving other problems...again this growth should be  progressive.  This brings me to an issue with which I have gotten much better than I was, say fifteen years ago yet still need some work in this area. Whereas my i...

I have to be honest...more often than not I do. What will it take for us to learn? Personally, I believe I need another trip to a third world country as I did when I was 13 and I went to Peru. We get caught in this fictitious reality that the world is as WE see it. We have to realize that in the time you will read this post someone died from lack of clean water, someone else is waking up in their home because it is raining on them due to having no roof, someone else is being beaten (possibly to death) because they chose a religious view contradictory to what their government feels is "acceptable"... All of this being done while companies and organizations that could help to solve and/or eliminate these problems spend millions (and some billions) of dollars advertising in hopes of making more profit. It simply does not make sense to me....but some of you will say "who cares". I do... Additionally, while you are reading this there are Americans  putting their lives o...

I think the title of this post is how well we believe what is rightfully ours. We are given the following: Love, Joy, Peace, Longsuffering, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self-control . We get so caught up in the meaningless things of this world we lose focus and forget what we have been promised; it is ours for the taking! The need and desire to fill every moment of time completing a task has made us lose sight of taking time to enjoy our life while we are here on earth. Do we know how to rest? In these days it seems that we have lost the ability to do so (generally speaking). We have all of this technology that is meant to make us work more efficiently and get more done in less time. So why do we work longer hours? Why do we focus more of our time on things that waste our time? Why do we have less time to rest and relax? To go into even more depth...why do we not trust our God to do his part so that we may relax and enjoy the important things in life. Importan...

I challenge you all to watch this video. It is about fifteen minutes long. Now before you say you do not have time; think about the individuals that sacrificed their time to be on the side of the road throughout the trip. More importantly think about Sergeant First Class John C. Beale who gave his life not even two months ago so that you and I can have the freedom to use the internet to be watching this. This makes me proud to be an American, want to praise God for this great nation in which I live, and to send many prayers and much gratitude to those that serve to protect our freedom. P.S. - is someone cutting onions around here...or is there a fan on high?