ImNoBetterThanU

Busyness.. Complexity... Honestly this list could go on and on...      We need to just simplify. How is it that we get so caught up in things that we allow our souls to get so cluttered. Makes me think of a quote from the movie The Brothers Bloom where one of the characters told the other she believed he was constipated in his soul. Too graphic for you? So sorry...welcome to my blog. #keepinitreal Public Service Announcement: I also do not condone the watching of the aforementioned movie if you are easily offended HA!      So for me in 2017 I want to simplify; allowing the simple things to keep me holding on. Life will be much easier. With all the clutter, the "constipation", it causes unnecessary stress and tension that can lead to a feeling of being lost. For me, it will also cause me to (figuratively) hold on to things so tightly that eventually I will lose my grip and free fall. Thus falling into a state in which further causes confusion an...

     Believing, caring, encouragement, kindness, etc.      These aforementioned actions can change the world! Do you not believe me?Have you ever complimented someone to see them immediately light up with joy and gratitude? What if we were more consistent in this. Using our words to build up rather than tear down?      I would love if anyone reading this would commit to a 30 day challenge. Heck even just do it the remaining nine days of January and tell me what you see.      Keep in mind you are encouraged and welcome to go far above and beyond what I ask of you. However, if you choose you can start small as I lay out in the forthcoming sentences.     Choose one individual and tell them something encouraging everyday. This can be in person, via text, through a phone call, Hangout (or Facetime or Skype), or however you choose. Again if you choose more than one person, go for it! Or if you choose to enc...

     Countless individuals have been asking how the court hearing went in California for legal custody/visitation of Andrew. I was hoping and praying for the best so that I can begin growing a deeper relationship with Andrew and although I wanted more; I believe that our God did the best for the present time. Rather than get all wordy and drawn out I will succinctly put the results below in bullet points. Partial Stipulation With notice greater than 48 hours I will be allowed reasonable visitation with Andrew and we will have a mental health professional involved as a third party for their input that will allow for fair progression in visitation. (i.e. - more time and eventually having him come here for split holidays, part of the summer, and any other that is agreed upon at that time) I have an allotted time with a 30 minute window to call and speak to Andrew once a week. I can call more often than once a week, but that does not...

So the last month I had been under severe attack and it was a very difficult time for me to remain positive and optimistic. Well, that time is over! Last and first of year offerings to Him and my first fruit offerings through denying and devoting ( fasting ) are already paying off in dividends! Whereas it was much more than I had anticipated or ever previously given up; I know that as a result I will experience a great breakthrough in an area(s) of my life as a result of my obedience . The  First Conference has been incredible this far and I look forward to the remainder of it. I wish I could take the next three days off just to focus on the devotional and  The Word in preparation for the message. When pressing into Him over the last three days I am encouraged to further my actions with great fervor.

I am grateful for my mother who has always been there for me and continues to show her support through all my times of need. I am grateful for my sister who despite our many differences has always shown me love and is the best sibling I could have hoped and dreamed of having. I am grateful for all my family who has stuck with me through all of my trials and tribulation sin life. I am grateful for my friends who show support when it is needed and are there for me to vent to. I am grateful for the mother of my son who has been an amazing mother and raised a bright, happy boy that will grow into a strong man. I am VERY grateful for the healthy son that I have been blessed with and regardless of the past I now have a bright future whereas I can be an example for him to become a great man that lives the life all men should. I am grateful for GOD for having the grace to let someone with my wicked past live a great life from this day forward so that I may do my part to make this world a bette...

Hello people...I realize that I have not been around here. Things are getting run down. I know. I know. Well, I am trying to get back into the mode of writing again. Not only is it therapeutic but it is thoroughly enjoyable as well. Anyway all I have is this which was shared with me by my mother. Enjoy the Ride!

Damage Inc.  Well, on my way to work this morning... BOOM! ...it happened.  What happened? (you might ask)... Yes I am OK...hopefully the car will be OK... Now moving on... Paper or plastic? Whole Foods will be there first chain to completely stop using plastic bags ! They plan to do so in all U.S., Canada, and U.K. store location no later than on Earth Day 2009 (April 22). They have stopped all orders for new so as they run out; they will no longer be available. Let us now just hope that other stores will follow in their footsteps. Some 4 to 5 trillion plastic bags—including large trash bags, thick shopping bags, and thin grocery bags—were produced globally in 2002, according to the Worldwatch Institute’s State of the World 2004 report. It is said that more than 100 million bags will be kept from the environment in 2009 alone as a result of this action. I for one would be happy to take a road trip and not see one of these bags in a tree or shrub.  Perhaps less widely known is the de...

I am truly amazed when I am out and about in public. Whether it be work, the grocery store, a restaurant, and even church *gasp* (yes even at church)...one common occurrence that I witness is someone complaining about something. They may be on the phone going off to the mystery human on the other line; or even just bantering to another individual near them. Either way I am truly amazed that out of everything we have in this country that there is so much to complain about. A country where our homeless live better than many people in third world countries.  I challenge anyone reading this...from this day on...take the opportunity to focus on the positive things in your life. The blessings that have been given to you. If you need to stop and look around at nature...it is soothing, relaxing, and can really allow for you to acknowledge some of the great things we have in life. If you apply your attention prosaically on a daily basis you will find things begin to look up for you. Once you re...

Well, here we are. My first blogoversary! I figured with this I should begin writing again. It has been far too long since I have regularly posted entries in here.  Well the last year was definitely filled with all kinds of change, adversity, etc.  January:  at the time I began writing in this blog I was just coming out of a state of pretty severe depression that was a result of a time in my life of obfuscation. I had never experienced depression before (whereas I am a predominantly happy go lucky kind of person) so it took me a while to even figure out what was wrong within myself. During that time I also began consistently experiencing migraine headaches that would last days. It was what some would call a low-point in my life. The turn around began when I flew into Texas for the holidays. I was able to visit my mother and sister and try to get my thoughts worked out. It worked...I went back to my home in Virginia after the holidays with a new sense of motivation.  February:  I decide...

may not seem to go together very well but that is where I am currently at in life. I have always been one to be the life of the party and will admit that I have a slight case of narcissism. However, when I discovered that I have a son it truly changed everything. It changed my attitude of life, my goals and aspirations, and most importantly my day to day actions. Many still inquire when I tell them about the last three years that I have missed out on. I continue to tell them it is of the past and can not be changed. I make them aware that I am focusing on the present and what needs to be done to be there and have a positive impact on my sons life in the future. The present is all we can truly control and the choices we make now will obviously control consequences and many circumstances we experience in the future. I also am grateful for how wonderful a job his mother has done in raising him thus far. He is very polite, happy, and respectful. How do I know this? (you ask) Well, I have ...

Have you ever wanted something so badly that your perception of the situation became distorted? I have. We can force situations so much that we lose perspective. Patience is a virtue...but damnit why? The great Aristotle once said, "We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit." Well I will tell you what I find myself doing repeatedly through life....making bad decisions. After all of the time and effort I put into college why am I not in a better situation? Should I dwell on this? On to my point... I will tell you why...everything happens for a reason and as long as we are constantly learning then we are living a fruitful life that will eventually pay dividends. Many of you know that I am part native American; Choctaw Indian to be exact. One of my favorite old proverbs from that heritage is this: "Every struggle whether won or lost, strengthens us for the next to come." How awesome is that? So the next time you are sitting and wonderin...

I noticed that the ads showing on AdSense were not very uplifting so I am producing a positive and optimistic blog entry in an attempt to counter the ads being shown. Because we all know that love and devotion will lead to immense happiness and the glass will be half full. OK I am tired and going to bed. Let us hope I included enough keywords to help the pendulum swing back into positivity.

I want to challenge you all today to make yourself aware of your surroundings. No I am not tripping on acid; just stay with me here. Really tune in and focus on everyone around you today. Keep track of how many excuses are made by individuals. Maybe a co-worker was late to work, maybe your spouse forgot to run an errand for you, or maybe you did not go to the gym (again) and make excuses for your self. The possibilities are endless as I am sure you can imagine. Anyway...my point is this; I think we will all realize (and further affirm) that excuses are abundant in our lives. How we got to this point with such a lack of accountability is beyond me. It is like the old saying about the frog. Throw him in boiling water and he will fight and jump to get out. Put him in cool water and slowly turn up the heat he will swim around gleefully until well done. I think this is how our society has gotten to where it is because the change has been so gradual over several decades. I digress... What we...

because I have a long journey ahead of me now. Today it was confirmed that I am a father! Now why a new horse carriage? Because I need something durable, I have missed out on the the first three and half years of his life. It has not completely sunk in so I have a lot to do which is obvious. This will truly be a turning point in my life that God will have to guide me through in order to do things as quickly and efficiently as possible. His birthday is three days after mine! Oh how I wish I could hold him now. My own flesh and blood...how crazy is that? One of the greatest things about this entire situation is his mother is approaching this situation with the mindset of collaboration, not isolation. How amazing is that? At a point in my life where I was beginning to humble myself and possibly take it too far by it leading to a feeling of insignificance, I am given the good news. There is nothing insignificant at all about being a father! I am working to control a dollop of desperation t...

to make a difference in this world. At what point did our society begin to believe that it was so difficult? The smallest things can make the biggest impact in our world. There is a story from someone I know about how a flight had been overbooked and the employee of the airlines responsible for getting everyone taken care of was positive, nice, and encouraging to everyone. Evidentially, once on the plane he was helping an elderly woman to her seat and once he had done so the back of the cabin erupted in applause. At that point a gentleman sitting in first class then stood up commending the young man and telling him that he was not paid enough and that he should be in management for the airlines. Now you want to know what he did that made everyone so happy? Do you want to know the secret? He was kind and joyful. Yes that is it. He was simply doing his job but being kind and joyful while doing so. That is all it takes. I believe that we all underestimate our powers as human beings. We ar...

letter. That is what I handed in to work today. Yes the opportunity I accepted less than two months ago....yeah that is the one. More to come later.

I sincerely believe that I have reached my apogee in life and can worry less about my future. Of course there will be plenty of disasters, road blocks, speed bumps, flat tires, etc. all along the way but I have truly pulled myself together enough to feel that I am now heading in the right direction. I mean they say we go full circle right? Ashes to ashes; dust to dust. So it seems logical to have an analogy of life as an orbit. At least to me it does. That is really all I have for now; I realize it was vague and possibly meaningless to some of you but it is where I am right now. With that all being said I by no means feel I am now on easy street. I have a job I do not like, I am in my 30's living with my mother, and college (among other things) has provided me with an immense amount of debt. But now that I am past the apogee things are looking bright.

may I blame my lack of posting as of late on the title of this post? I did not think so but, it was worth a try. Anyway I finally got a job after negotiating with a couple of different companies. I was offered the position last Friday and officially received the offer letter today and accepted! What a relief... I had been diligently searching since my arrival back here in Texas and has maintained a positive outlook on it all exuding confidence throughout every interview. Then my interview last Wednesday arrived. It was going quite well and I thought for sure I had the job. Then right at the end my confidence was shot and discouraging thoughts began to flood my mind. I left that interview wondering what I had done to deserve the consistent uphill climb that I have been facing in life the last few months. I was REALLY being negative...out of character for me since getting my life back on track recently. Good thing I had remained so positive for weeks previously I think I had some good en...