ImNoBetterThanU

     What does that even mean? Well, it means that four years ago on this day I wrote my first blog posting ever . Going back and reading that last night was interesting to say the least.      I referenced my time in middle school and high school as "...some of the best years of my life." and my move to California "...was the best move I had made...", and even my time in Virginia had its postives whereas I "...minimized smoking, drinking, and eating out.".      Reading that was highly  encouraging. Realizing how far I have come. I was far from living a healthy lifestyle at that time period of my life physically, emotionally, psychologically, or Spiritually. At that time I was scared, confused, and alone. It was before I discovered Andrew , the greatest gift God has ever given me. A time when I knew little of how to be a good friend, son, brother, father, boyfriend, etc. (Which by the way is an area I still have a long way to...

So I realize it has been a while since I have written a post. So much has happened since then. There is much to rejoice about! Will you rejoice with me? I will start with some great things about my son Andrew. I have kind of kept him out of the blog for a while, but this is worth sharing. Recently he graduated pre-K; at that time they had a math test of 100 problems of addition and subtraction. The children were then told they had five minutes to complete as many problems as they could. Well, my son Andrew completed all 100 and got them all correct! How incredibly exciting and awesome is that! WOOOHOOOOOO! I got to talk to him about it and he spoke to me longer than he ever had previously. We must have talked for a total of fifteen minutes or more. He told me about a medal he got and then he sang to me! It was incredible. Then a couple of weeks ago when we spoke he was reading with his mother when I called. So when he got on the phone he asked if I would like ...

Hello people...I realize that I have not been around here. Things are getting run down. I know. I know. Well, I am trying to get back into the mode of writing again. Not only is it therapeutic but it is thoroughly enjoyable as well. Anyway all I have is this which was shared with me by my mother. Enjoy the Ride!

Well, here we are. My first blogoversary! I figured with this I should begin writing again. It has been far too long since I have regularly posted entries in here.  Well the last year was definitely filled with all kinds of change, adversity, etc.  January:  at the time I began writing in this blog I was just coming out of a state of pretty severe depression that was a result of a time in my life of obfuscation. I had never experienced depression before (whereas I am a predominantly happy go lucky kind of person) so it took me a while to even figure out what was wrong within myself. During that time I also began consistently experiencing migraine headaches that would last days. It was what some would call a low-point in my life. The turn around began when I flew into Texas for the holidays. I was able to visit my mother and sister and try to get my thoughts worked out. It worked...I went back to my home in Virginia after the holidays with a new sense of motivation.  February:  I decide...

Those are the statistics provided by the doctor on my son! Below is him being happy as can be inthe waiting room! WooHooo!

The uncertainty references the next few months of my life. Since recently discovering I have a son I have done much to change my lifestyle and everything in an attempt to be with him in whatever way possible. Meeting my son a couple of weeks ago was truly an amazing experience and went perfectly (obvoiusly excluding having missed out on the previous time in his life and then having to leave). The time we got together was spent blithely going along with no regard to time. I feel I greatly utilized the time there from when I stepped off the plane until I had to be dropped off at the airport the best I could. Now life has taken a huge turn....emotionally this has been difficult (MUCH more difficult than I could have expected). Obviously I am not omniscient in any sense of the word I now feel that I have to be so careful in everything I do whereas the consequences to my actions can greatly impact my son as well. It has absolutely even further changed the way I go about things on a daily b...

WOW! What can I say? Last night I went to sleep somewhere between 11:00 and 11:30 PM. At approximately 3:00 AM I was awakened and realized I had a strong urge to use the restroom...so I did. I then returned to bed as most individuals do at such a ridiculous time on a Saturday morning. Well, I could not get back to sleep. I continued to lie in bed with my eyes closed in total relaxation... After about 45 minutes I finally realized that I was awake. So I figured I would get online and clean out my inbox since it had not been done since Monday. Added an entry to one of my other blogs with some comic relief. Then off to the gym I went around 5:30. I had a great workout that extended itself into the seventh hour of the day. At this time you might be asking me how I came up with the title of this entry....bear with me here folks. I was going to go to breakfast but for some reason I decided half way to my destination to come back home. Upon arrival I thought I would get back online. It was th...

because I have a long journey ahead of me now. Today it was confirmed that I am a father! Now why a new horse carriage? Because I need something durable, I have missed out on the the first three and half years of his life. It has not completely sunk in so I have a lot to do which is obvious. This will truly be a turning point in my life that God will have to guide me through in order to do things as quickly and efficiently as possible. His birthday is three days after mine! Oh how I wish I could hold him now. My own flesh and blood...how crazy is that? One of the greatest things about this entire situation is his mother is approaching this situation with the mindset of collaboration, not isolation. How amazing is that? At a point in my life where I was beginning to humble myself and possibly take it too far by it leading to a feeling of insignificance, I am given the good news. There is nothing insignificant at all about being a father! I am working to control a dollop of desperation t...

Notice that I stated I was being lazy in my previous post? Well, I have spent the last several hours working on my blog design now. Did I snag a free template from the web? Of course I did but I have since been tweaking it to make it my own. I also stated in my previous post that I did not want to post two posts today...well here that is. Anyway... the reason I am writing this post is because I almost went back and deleted a couple of my recent posts. Just as I was about to permanently remove them from existence I stopped. Is that not part of the greatness of blogs? A few months, years, or decades down the road we can look back and reflect on these periods of our life. Who knows one day I may become a good free lance writer...LOL. If that does happen to occur then I can look back and laugh at these posts. (although I am sure I will either way) Now that I wasted more of your precious life I am going to bed.

They truly have nothing in common but I am feeling lazy today and did not want to add two new posts. And honestly I have been waiting for a while to blog about Intellivision in hopes of coming up with some witty/comical post for you all to read. Well, sorry...I got nothin'. Suck it up and keep reading folks, you came this far did you not? I ran across some interesting information today...Medical field(s) with the highest divorce rate: psychiatrists and marriage counselors. I just found that interesting (however not surprised). ...on a lighter note... Golly, gee, Wally Do any of the rest of you remember (or did you also own) the kick ass gaming console called 'Intellivision'?I did and it was awesome!! It played very well on our 18 year old RCA television as well. Remember the RCA TVs that would outlive your family pets? Yeah, those were cool too. Then some genius notified our consumer electronic companies that if they build them to last for so long we will not purchase more....

life is such an amazing journey. Your eyes are always opened at some point as well when you know that it is truly time to turn the page and move on to the next chapter in your life. It is never easy but it is something that is necessary for personal growth. If there is something in your life that repeatedly causes you to act impetuously then it is probably best that you remove that from your life. When these things consistently occur time and time again, one could say that this is highly indicative of being a major cause of angst and pain in life. When strong emotions are involved in these types of things it only makes it much more difficult to actually sever the ties and move on but it is better for everyone involved in the end. It is difficult (maybe impossible for some) to see this as not being erroneous but, years down the road everyone involved to look back at this day as a true turning point. The day some of life's complications were eradicated and the next chapter could begi...

As promised...here is a continuation of my life. However, last night I had realized that I had merged in some previously entered posts from LiveJournal so there is much more of my history contained within my little piece of the blog world than I thought. Blah, blah, blah....as though any of you care...lol Well when I last left you in such great suspense I was rambling on about scuffed knees, impatient drivers, and dead-end street...exciting I know! LOL Soon afterward I was allowed to ride to school which was a very "cool" thing to do. It was the most expeditious way to get to school with exception of my parents taking me. I lived too close (just inside the five mile radius) to have a bus stop near my house. Whereas I truly enjoyed this new found independence it came at a price. It did not take long before some high school kids realized that I would be riding along one of the major streets everyday around the same time. They found it amusing to harass me by speeding by as clos...

There are many different definitions to the aforementioned word used in the title of this post. I am opting to go with the one that has to do with having a positive feeling in reference to a previous time in your life. That current state of nostalgia for me would be the days when I had a job...lol. As much am I am enjoying the time I have had to work on getting myself back to a state of good physical health; I repine the additional time that I have on my hands as it is getting to be a bit much. However, I realize that I have to be patient and that the right job will come along. Besides to be realistic, I have only been looking for work for about two weeks...LMAO. The best news of all is that I have been successful in not smoking ( I have cheated a couple of times when drinking...but I rationalize that to acceptance...lol), I am also feeling better physically than I have in well over a year. My back is feeling better than it has in several months as well. I have not had a migraine ...