Self-effacing nepotism...

may not seem to go together very well but that is where I am currently at in life. I have always been one to be the life of the party and will admit that I have a slight case of narcissism. However, when I discovered that I have a son it truly changed everything. It changed my attitude of life, my goals and aspirations, and most importantly my day to day actions.

Many still inquire when I tell them about the last three years that I have missed out on. I continue to tell them it is of the past and can not be changed. I make them aware that I am focusing on the present and what needs to be done to be there and have a positive impact on my sons life in the future. The present is all we can truly control and the choices we make now will obviously control consequences and many circumstances we experience in the future.

I also am grateful for how wonderful a job his mother has done in raising him thus far. He is very polite, happy, and respectful. How do I know this? (you ask) Well, I have spent much time on the phone with both him and his mother. I am also sure she will appreciate my being in his life so that she can subside from forced animus.

All in all the most difficult part of all of this is to resist the temptation to be prescient in what will be.

Many also ask me if I am nervous about being a father. I tel them that amazingly there is not one ounce of nervousness but rather rather complete excitement. God works in amazing ways and I have had wonderful relationships in the past that involved children albeit none of them were biologically mine. Well, finally by the grace of God that time is now here and I am excited and grateful to have a beautiful, healthy son to which I can be a father. Besides I intend to be fully disciplined and adaptable throughout the process to be the best father I can be. I want to help to develop the best man I can out of my offspring.

A disciplined person that is disciplined in thought and then executes disciplined actions will always have a great performance. That my friends is what I fully intend to do. With that being said I will acquiesce to all other in order to have my son among the top priorities in my life. I love you son!


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