ImNoBetterThanU

     Believing, caring, encouragement, kindness, etc.      These aforementioned actions can change the world! Do you not believe me?Have you ever complimented someone to see them immediately light up with joy and gratitude? What if we were more consistent in this. Using our words to build up rather than tear down?      I would love if anyone reading this would commit to a 30 day challenge. Heck even just do it the remaining nine days of January and tell me what you see.      Keep in mind you are encouraged and welcome to go far above and beyond what I ask of you. However, if you choose you can start small as I lay out in the forthcoming sentences.     Choose one individual and tell them something encouraging everyday. This can be in person, via text, through a phone call, Hangout (or Facetime or Skype), or however you choose. Again if you choose more than one person, go for it! Or if you choose to enc...

     So I just came out of a whirlwind of a near fantasy month. So amazing it is difficult to describe.      It began with the celebration of our freedom on Independence day weekend.  How can one not rejoice in a time as such. With everything going on in America many have lost hope, but hopelessness is not  what our nation was built upon. As Bono of U2 stated, America is not a country it is an idea. The definition of an idea is "a thought or suggestion as to a possible course of action" or "the aim of purpose". It is ever evolving and whether you believe it or not we do maintain a certain level of control within the shaping of that idea. One thing we have to remember is that media thrives on the negative because they want ratings. They will use images and sounds to paint a picture to portray to the minds of the world in a way they feel will draw more people in and increase their ratings. Kind of sick, I know. But there is also so much good progr...

     So today on this Memorial Day of 2015 when we honor our fallen troops of past and the men and women currently serving our country to protect our freedom I felt led to open the blog, blow off the dust, and write a new post.      Today I exercised my great freedom by participating in  the Murph Challenge . I did not really have a strong desire to do so, but knowing all the sacrifices made by the aforementioned men and women I felt I could endure some suck in honor of them. More specifically Lt. Michael P. Murphy endured far more than I have in my entire life so it only felt right. His story can be read here .      I can also say that as hectic a day as I have had, awakening at 5:30 this morning and just now getting to a point where I can sit an relax (now 5:25 pm) this was sincerely the most amazing and memorable Memorial Day I can remember in all of the 39 times I have revolved around the sun. Good exercise, good friends (see bel...

     Countless individuals have been asking how the court hearing went in California for legal custody/visitation of Andrew. I was hoping and praying for the best so that I can begin growing a deeper relationship with Andrew and although I wanted more; I believe that our God did the best for the present time. Rather than get all wordy and drawn out I will succinctly put the results below in bullet points. Partial Stipulation With notice greater than 48 hours I will be allowed reasonable visitation with Andrew and we will have a mental health professional involved as a third party for their input that will allow for fair progression in visitation. (i.e. - more time and eventually having him come here for split holidays, part of the summer, and any other that is agreed upon at that time) I have an allotted time with a 30 minute window to call and speak to Andrew once a week. I can call more often than once a week, but that does not...

As this Thanksgiving day is rapidly coming to a close I have been reflecting on the last year. It has been the most amazing year of my entire life. The physical and emotional healing that God has done in my life would have previously been unimaginable had you asked me one year ago. The emotional, psychological, mental, spiritual, and yes even physical growth I have experienced over the last year has been miraculous as you consider where I have been in life. At this point in my life I could give you a long list of current circumstances in my life that would have had me stressed, worried, angry, and bitter (just to name a few) just twelve months ago. In fact, my overall circumstances in life were much better than they currently are and I still allowed many of the aforementioned emotions and feelings to control my life at this time last year. However, today I can say I am joyful and at peace with myself and my life. I am also being used daily to impact peoples...

I feel like that is what God is wanting me to do these days. He has been doing such an amazing work in my heart over the last month. For several months now he has been telling me to be a better steward. Not only of my finances, but of everything He has blessed me with. My job, time, friends, family, health, etc. I feel that I have been doing a great job of being a better steward in all areas...but we all know God will allow trials to enter our lives in order to stretch us as individuals and make us more mature in the physical realm as well as the spiritual. Well, Friday July 30th my income dropped over $12,000.00 year. This is a significant amount of my net income. This happening at a time when my insurance renewal is due, vehicle maintenance is rapidly approaching, the need for new tires seem to be on the horizon, and that is just expenses related to my car! Needless to say, this is one of those trials. It was extremely discouraging initially, but...

So I realize it has been a while since I have written a post. So much has happened since then. There is much to rejoice about! Will you rejoice with me? I will start with some great things about my son Andrew. I have kind of kept him out of the blog for a while, but this is worth sharing. Recently he graduated pre-K; at that time they had a math test of 100 problems of addition and subtraction. The children were then told they had five minutes to complete as many problems as they could. Well, my son Andrew completed all 100 and got them all correct! How incredibly exciting and awesome is that! WOOOHOOOOOO! I got to talk to him about it and he spoke to me longer than he ever had previously. We must have talked for a total of fifteen minutes or more. He told me about a medal he got and then he sang to me! It was incredible. Then a couple of weeks ago when we spoke he was reading with his mother when I called. So when he got on the phone he asked if I would like ...

Breath brings life... God took dust from the earth and with the breath of life  formed man. ( Genesis 2:7 ) He also provided the  breath of life  to bring dry bones in the valley to life. ( Ezekial 37:9   - 10 ) Are you asking how we get the  breath of life ? It is easy. You read His word. It is our  breath of life . It will cleanse the soul, mend the heart, strengthen us emotionally, etc. The power of the living Word is beyond limitation as we know it. It will cause a fire to burn within us, feeding our passions ans desires that are God given. Once that fire is ignited you then need to feed the fire. One way of doing so is to live life with godly people. Keep them close and dear. Share your struggles so they can support you through prayer. Share you successes so they can rejoice and praise with you! This is one of many ways to feed the fire. I for one am very grateful for the people I have had brought into my life through divine...

Do you ever find yourself boasting about future events? Yeah me too. Should we? Absolutely not.  Should we faithfully plan for a better tomorrow for ourselves, our family, and friends? Absolutely. We should simply do so in humility, faith, and with much gratitude. The reason I write this is; what if you sustain a fatal bite from a viper ? I know what some of you may be saying...there are no vipers around me. Well more specifically it was a highly venomous snake that sank its fangs deep into his flesh and injected a fatal amount of poison. What did Paul do? He shook it off. Will you do the same if this occurred? Could your viper be a devastating tornado, drunk driver hitting you, or heart failure? Let's even tone it down a notch. What if your viper is losing your job, losing your home, losing your significant other... Will you allow that circumstance to gain control of your life or will you remain steadfast in thanking our Father for His inherent goodn...

I want to preface this post by stating that last Tuesday was a ministry night for leaders and emergin leaders within the church. During that time Alan Smith  had an amazing word for me that spoke directly to my heart at just the right time in my life. It gave me a new perspective on life in general and has been yet another turning point in my life that I can add to all the great advances that are occurring in my life over the last couple of years.  Memorial Day Weekend, this used to be one of my favorite weekends because there were plenty of parties. For me this weekend consisted of ingesting drugs, alcohol, and likely times of being sexually immoral...oftentimes with multiple partners (or the same numerous times). Sounds fun right? Wrong!  None of it was ever enough. Tuesday (if I even made it in that day) I would drag myself into work feeling as though Mike Tyson had his way with me in the ring. All for what? To go out again Tuesday night after wo...

I have to be honest...more often than not I do. What will it take for us to learn? Personally, I believe I need another trip to a third world country as I did when I was 13 and I went to Peru. We get caught in this fictitious reality that the world is as WE see it. We have to realize that in the time you will read this post someone died from lack of clean water, someone else is waking up in their home because it is raining on them due to having no roof, someone else is being beaten (possibly to death) because they chose a religious view contradictory to what their government feels is "acceptable"... All of this being done while companies and organizations that could help to solve and/or eliminate these problems spend millions (and some billions) of dollars advertising in hopes of making more profit. It simply does not make sense to me....but some of you will say "who cares". I do... Additionally, while you are reading this there are Americans  putting their lives o...

Let’s talk about tomorrow—today. What will your tomorrow be like? Tomorrow could bring death. From the moment we’re born, we’re dying. Someone has said that death is one appointment you may postpone, but can’t cancel (see Psalm 89:47-48). Tomorrow could bring about sickness (Job 14:1-2). We desire a healthy life. But we have to deal with the fickleness of life and our fragile bodies. Tomorrow could bring about trouble and suffering. Our days are filled with pain and grief (Job 5:7, 7:1; Ecclesiastes 2:23). We live with frustration, disappointment, and bitterness (Psalm 90:9-10; Ecclesiastes 5:17). Tomorrow may of course bring no change. Just the mundane grind of sameness. Tomorrow is just like yesterday and the same as today (Ecclesiastes 1:9). Tomorrow could bring about success and rewards. (Ah, finally something positive!) A promotion? Good profits? Life is good and you can’t wait for tomorrow to come (Isaiah 56:12). But what about the next tomorrow? Will tomorrow’s tomor...

I am grateful for my mother who has always been there for me and continues to show her support through all my times of need. I am grateful for my sister who despite our many differences has always shown me love and is the best sibling I could have hoped and dreamed of having. I am grateful for all my family who has stuck with me through all of my trials and tribulation sin life. I am grateful for my friends who show support when it is needed and are there for me to vent to. I am grateful for the mother of my son who has been an amazing mother and raised a bright, happy boy that will grow into a strong man. I am VERY grateful for the healthy son that I have been blessed with and regardless of the past I now have a bright future whereas I can be an example for him to become a great man that lives the life all men should. I am grateful for GOD for having the grace to let someone with my wicked past live a great life from this day forward so that I may do my part to make this world a bette...

Hello people...I realize that I have not been around here. Things are getting run down. I know. I know. Well, I am trying to get back into the mode of writing again. Not only is it therapeutic but it is thoroughly enjoyable as well. Anyway all I have is this which was shared with me by my mother. Enjoy the Ride!

I am truly amazed when I am out and about in public. Whether it be work, the grocery store, a restaurant, and even church *gasp* (yes even at church)...one common occurrence that I witness is someone complaining about something. They may be on the phone going off to the mystery human on the other line; or even just bantering to another individual near them. Either way I am truly amazed that out of everything we have in this country that there is so much to complain about. A country where our homeless live better than many people in third world countries.  I challenge anyone reading this...from this day on...take the opportunity to focus on the positive things in your life. The blessings that have been given to you. If you need to stop and look around at nature...it is soothing, relaxing, and can really allow for you to acknowledge some of the great things we have in life. If you apply your attention prosaically on a daily basis you will find things begin to look up for you. Once you re...

Well, here we are. My first blogoversary! I figured with this I should begin writing again. It has been far too long since I have regularly posted entries in here.  Well the last year was definitely filled with all kinds of change, adversity, etc.  January:  at the time I began writing in this blog I was just coming out of a state of pretty severe depression that was a result of a time in my life of obfuscation. I had never experienced depression before (whereas I am a predominantly happy go lucky kind of person) so it took me a while to even figure out what was wrong within myself. During that time I also began consistently experiencing migraine headaches that would last days. It was what some would call a low-point in my life. The turn around began when I flew into Texas for the holidays. I was able to visit my mother and sister and try to get my thoughts worked out. It worked...I went back to my home in Virginia after the holidays with a new sense of motivation.  February:  I decide...

If we took the time to sit and count our blessings; just how long would that take us?  It would take hours...possibly even days. You disagree? Well you should try it. You have life, family, friends, your computer and Internet connection you are using to read this, the power used to power that computer, talents, skills (like the ability to read you are currently using)...get the picture?  I challenge you all to begin that list. You will not complete it in one sitting but at least initiate the process. Next, I would like for you to rate some of those blessings. Now take the top five (or more) and when you wake up in the morning be grateful for those things. Thank God for those blessings (or just be grateful if a non-believer). You will be amazed at how your day will start off on a positive track. If you make this a habit you will find that you will begin to be more grateful on a more consistent basis throughout each and every day.  Then as you begin to share your blessings with others yo...

The uncertainty references the next few months of my life. Since recently discovering I have a son I have done much to change my lifestyle and everything in an attempt to be with him in whatever way possible. Meeting my son a couple of weeks ago was truly an amazing experience and went perfectly (obvoiusly excluding having missed out on the previous time in his life and then having to leave). The time we got together was spent blithely going along with no regard to time. I feel I greatly utilized the time there from when I stepped off the plane until I had to be dropped off at the airport the best I could. Now life has taken a huge turn....emotionally this has been difficult (MUCH more difficult than I could have expected). Obviously I am not omniscient in any sense of the word I now feel that I have to be so careful in everything I do whereas the consequences to my actions can greatly impact my son as well. It has absolutely even further changed the way I go about things on a daily b...

that is what I made with God approximately nine months ago. At that time I was alone, depressed, miserable, bored, disgusted with myself and although making the most money I had ever made in my life I was empty. So I made an elementary commitment to begin to live a better life. That takes an immense amount of discipline. Culture of Discipline 1. Disciplined people 2. Disciplined thought 3. Disciplined action The combination of those three things will inevitably lead to Great Performance. You have to do this in all aspects of life. Your relationships, your job, your family, friendships, etc. This can be a struggle. especially in this day and age where we all have become so "busy" that we have trouble finding the time to do the things we know we need to. This is where we begin to fail. We have become slaves to time. We are the only ones that control what we do, how we do it, and more importantly when we do it. For those believers...you may be saying "God controls it"....

may not seem to go together very well but that is where I am currently at in life. I have always been one to be the life of the party and will admit that I have a slight case of narcissism. However, when I discovered that I have a son it truly changed everything. It changed my attitude of life, my goals and aspirations, and most importantly my day to day actions. Many still inquire when I tell them about the last three years that I have missed out on. I continue to tell them it is of the past and can not be changed. I make them aware that I am focusing on the present and what needs to be done to be there and have a positive impact on my sons life in the future. The present is all we can truly control and the choices we make now will obviously control consequences and many circumstances we experience in the future. I also am grateful for how wonderful a job his mother has done in raising him thus far. He is very polite, happy, and respectful. How do I know this? (you ask) Well, I have ...