Friday, December 31, 2010

Now you see me, now you don't...

Due to not being aware of any true encounter with God in life, many individuals have allowed doubt and lack of faith creep into their lives. Oftentimes I have heard, if there is a God I would see Him. I could just say look around, but that will be for another post another time. Do you really have to see something to believe in it? True faith that something exists is what I am talking about.

Do you believe in snow?  Do you believe in the sun? Do you believe there is blood pumping through your veins? Seriously...when it is 106° outside do you still believe in snow? When the darkness of night overtakes the atmosphere do you still believe in the sun? When there are no lacerations, abrasions, or any other open wounds on your skin do you still believe there is blood pumping through your veins?

Now I know what some of you may be saying..."I have seen all those before, I have never seen God." OK you got me...or did you?

Have you ever seen the process of a tree becoming paper? Have you ever seen the formation of a kidney stone? No?

Then kidney stones must be fictional right? Paper surely does not come from trees, it must just appear as paper.

I think you get the point...just think about it, pray about it.

Until next year.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Krystal Finish Car Wash...are you parked in the garage or are you doing what you were created for?

This morning I went to the car wash to remove from the hood of my car the unpleasantly large gift left by what was apparently a large flock of birds. TMI? Sorry.

Anyway...while I was using the high pressure thrust of the water to remove the aforementioned aerodynamic obstructions from my vehicle the Lord was showing me something about our own lives. As I washed the dirt and filth away I noticed several new blemishes from chips, to scratches, and scrapes in numerous areas. Whereas my initial reaction was one of lackluster emotions including frustration, disappointment, maybe even a dash of anger I quickly stopped to ask myself why.

Take every thought captive...

I know, I know. Some of you are now thinking that I have gone super-spiritual. Hear me out. What good does it do to have any negative emotions about something so minor? I get it, you pay tens of thousands of dollars for something and we are told to be good stewards of what God blesses us with. I get that. However, I have no control over what others do when parked next to my vehicle. Those emotions and thoughts can do no good! They are all negative!

Something else God spoke to me through this was that even the vehicles that have pristine bodies and look like new on the outside...well those same vehicles still have the same internal wear and tear from mileage, weather, and other elements that effect them. None of this can be avoided unless you leave your vehicle parked inside and never use it.

So what are you doing with your life? Are you parked safely in your garage?
Why not get out and do what you were designed to do? Even the most beautiful individuals in this world have junk on the inside. We ALL have suffered. We all have hurt. We all have endured losses. Even so you can still live in freedom and enjoy the beautiful world which we have been given. So stop trying to look so good. Find your group of friends with which you can be transparent and honest and talk about the junk on the inside. That is the only way you will truly ever find healing. That is what Jesus died on the cross for, why He came to earth in the form of man. He understands and He wants to heal and restore our hearts and souls.

That is all I have to say....

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Pilgrim Pride or Humble Pie

As this Thanksgiving day is rapidly coming to a close I have been reflecting on the last year. It has been the most amazing year of my entire life. The physical and emotional healing that God has done in my life would have previously been unimaginable had you asked me one year ago. The emotional, psychological, mental, spiritual, and yes even physical growth I have experienced over the last year has been miraculous as you consider where I have been in life. At this point in my life I could give you a long list of current circumstances in my life that would have had me stressed, worried, angry, and bitter (just to name a few) just twelve months ago. In fact, my overall circumstances in life were much better than they currently are and I still allowed many of the aforementioned emotions and feelings to control my life at this time last year. However, today I can say I am joyful and at peace with myself and my life. I am also being used daily to impact peoples lives in incredibly positive ways. With all that being said you might say that I would have every right to be proud...

I disagree.

I am utterly and completely humbled. All this is a result of my dying to myself daily and surrendering my life to Christ. I finally have a thorough understanding of giving up complete control to Him. Finances, time, relationships, emotions....I mean everything. Do I do this every minute of every day? I try...yet I am human. At times my flesh takes over but, the key to it all is intentionally correct this as soon as you become aware. Take every thought captive. It takes radical obedience. As a result, I am shown very often the the positive impact I am having on the lives of those I come in contact with. ALL if this is only possible by my surrendering to God and allowing the Holy Spirit to guide and direct my thoughts and actions.


...and that my friends is why I choose to eat humble pie rather than walk with pilgrim pride, because NONE of this is possible on my own. So today I am thankful first and foremost for the grace and mercy of our God and the work Jesus did to save my soul.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

I know it is daunting...

Have you ever been faced with the daunting task of restoring something that is old, rundown, falling apart? Something that is in the poorest condition after years of abuse and being misused? Was it discouraging just thinking about it? I can relate. Sometimes we never complete the task...maybe we never even start the task.

Well, I am here to talk about something that was abused, mistreated, malnourished, etc. All of this went on for well over a decade. Can you imagine the condition of something after more than ten years of this? How do you view that looking, feeling, projecting to others?

You know what that something is? My soul...

For years sexual immorality, drugs, alcohol, gossip, slander, manipulation, tearing others down, making fun, etc. These are the things I was doing and/or exposed to for over ten years. The very thing that is a gift to us all I abused. I filled it with lust, lasciviousness, envying, revellings, etc. Corrupting my soul to the point of disgust...

However, you know what? There is someone that took on the task of restoring my soul. No band aids, no layers of paint to cover it up....true and actual restoration. That is amazing! Where I am today is amazing. In fact I am lucky to not be dead. There were times in my past where I mixed three or more drugs together of which just one has killed individuals in the past. There were times when my sexual immorality was that of epic proportion that would disgust most anyone...you know what? None of that matters. I have been restored.

God is amazing and mighty to love us all so much that our sin can not compare to His grace and mercy.

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Everyone forgives, albeit posthumously...

Sometimes I feel that individuals keep trying to fix something without knowing the root cause of the problem. I know for a fact that I have done this myself on many occasions and as a human on this earth will likely fall victim to this very act again. For, example a lack of feelings of self-worth, belonging, [insert your own personal struggle here], etc. Below is a great example found in an excerpt from a sermon taught by Matt Chandler of The Village Church.
"Recovering sight is what Jesus is going to bring in the gospel. I don't know that you can get through life without being hurt and wounded by something. You know, daddy didn't hug you well enough. And it's really not your daddy's fault. Dr. Hannah was here this week for a pastor's conference. He told a great story about his wife when she was sixteen—mowed the lawn, trying to surprise her daddy, and she left this one little strip undone. And when her daddy got home, he re-mowed the whole lawn. But he was a very loving man and loved her and encouraged her, but in that one instant, the devil grabbed that, just grabbed that; and now she can't do it well enough. Just that one little thing, despite all this evidence to the contrary. So getting hurt, and getting wounded—it messes up your sight so you can't see. So then what ends up happening is you don't want to forgive because if you forgive, you're going to let them off the hook. And you can't let them off the hook—never being able to see that the only one you're really hurting is you. Or getting bitter and angry and wanting vengeance, never being able to see that the only soul that's being tore up is yours. And so Jesus goes on and on—“I'm going to give you eyes to see.”"
As you can see that one event was used to cause years of painful memories and false perceptions of not being able to do things well enough or up to high standards. So be sure to be aware of your actions and more importantly your words. Our words carry power that is so much more than we can comprehend. Our actions too carry power and even our eyes hold great power. When you speak to others speak with intentionality to their hearts with positive and encouraging words.


P.S. - I just finished going through some of my older posts from 2008 and even in my writing (and obviously those posts triggering memories of that time) I have grown so much as a person in the last two years it is incredible. It just goes to show the process is in full effect. 

Alterity is what I want...

What is the difference? ...between me and everyone else you know.

Many people that know me may answer that question by saying "nothing".

I wholly desire that everyone that knows me (and those that do not know me that I simply come in contact with) would answer the opposite.

I realize that there is but an interstice between my alterity and me being utterly familiar to those that encounter my presence in my life. That interstice is simply the difference between radical obedience and selective obedience. I want to be radically obedient at all times. Even if this radical obedience causes non believers to call me a Bible thumper or even if it causes my friends at church to call me a super-spiritual geek. None of this matters. Assiduous attention should be paid to our actions in life.

Jesus had asked that we consume Him; be preoccupied with Him day and night. That is what I want. I want to make a difference in this life. A difference in the life of my son Andrew, his mother (and her family), my family, my friends, my church, my community, and the world. This is all possible through radical obedience. The amazing transition in my life over the last two years is only possible by the amazing work of the Spirit residing in me. With that indwelling is the power invested in me! That power in vested in me will constantly work to change me from the inside out if I surrender myself to that power.

Here is something I heard from Matt Chandler that I would like to share:
"...there is a pursuit of Jesus Christ, a progressive sanctification that pulls us into the fullness of what He has for us until He calls us home and perfects us in all things." -Matt Chandler
Not sure about you, but I find that beautiful and encouraging. That progressive sanctification is what carries me onward knowing that I will continually become a better man through Him after seeing the positive changes over the last two years of my life. The freedom I experience today is only a sliver of what he designed me to experience.

"A man has to squeeze past the cross to get into hell." - Richard C. Halverson (1916-1995) U.S. Senate Chaplain

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Talking, thinking, doing...

Are you a talker?
...or are you a thinker and a doer?

I think oftentimes we talk a lot about what others are doing and how great that is? I also believe that oftentimes we talk about what we are going to do and do not do it. You may feel led to go pray for someone for healing. Do you do it? I know recently I was talker...and that was all I did.

I can personally tell you of an instance where I was a talker and not a mover and shaker. Now with this being common in our society you may be asking what the big deal is. Well for me, at this time in my life I feel that I am to be going boldly out into the world to be a part of the walking revival that is taking place. What revival you ask? Well, if you know me personally that is all the more reason that I should be doing my part! I sincerely feel that I am being called to be much more bold in my life in reference to not only sharing the gospel, but simply showing Christ's love to everyone I come in contact with.

Just earlier this month I went on a mini road trip (thanks to a good friend of mine providing my fuel and meals). Well, the individuals with whom we were staying had an incident just one day prior to our arrival that caused the wife to be hospitalized. During a Messianic service I attended the Friday evening that I was to drive up there I received a word to pray over her for complete and total healing. I heard God, shared what I heard, even asked a member the altar team to cover me in prayer for the journey ahead. Later that evening I began the journey...Sunday afternoon I began the journey home.

You may be asking what happened in between. I can tell you that I did not take the opportunity I was provided (upon two trips to the hospital) to pray for healing for this wonderful daughter of God. Why you ask? Looking back I do not know why. Essentially it does not matter why. I was disobedient.

Why did I share this with you all? I suppose one aspect was public confession and the other part is to be transparent to anyone else reading this that has done the same thing. Do not beat yourself up. The past is the past. Move on, learn from it and let us go out into the world and share the love, grace, and mercy which have been extended to us.

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Ritual idols or idle rituals...

Do you raise your hands during worship? Do you pray out loud?

Why? Why do you do these things? Is your heart in it?

Often times the aforementioned actions are done to impress those around you. Or maybe you do those things to hide the lies of your "private" life and private sin from others. Or you do them just because you feel like it is what you are supposed to do. When this occurs these all become ritual idols. You spend so much time thinking about these things that they themselves become an idol. 

Others may be thinking that there is no need to raise your hands during worship or no need to pray out loud. Be careful, do not let these actions become idle rituals either. There is meaning behind the lifting of our hands. It shows surrender and we are designed to worship. Just send anyone to a sporting event, concert, (or whatever it is that gets someone excited. You scream, raise your hands, jump up and down, just to name a few). Praying out loud (or even just speaking confessions out loud) are necessary. The power of our words is incredible. I was unaware of this myself until just this last year. That is why it is so important to speak life in to others. Speak into their hearts intentionally to exhort and encourage them. Even speaking of yourself and your own life requires positive words and thoughts in order to nourish the fruit that you are capable of bearing!

You have to put your heart into all you do. Otherwise these outward actions simply become just that. If it comes down to the Christian life; are the outward actions not the easy part?
I say yes and I know this from experience. It is simple to show up raise your hands during worship, tell everyone how great you are doing and then go out get drunk, sleep with someone, and deal with depression alone in bed later in the week. So where was your heart in all of that? Why not do the difficult part and truly surrender your heart and let these "rituals" not only be physical actions but get the spirit involved. Even those that are not Christian believe in a spiritual realm. In fact many of them put their hearts more into what they do and believe than many Christians. 

It is time for Christians to get past the easy part and get to work. As long as you have breath you should be living deeply and surrendering that life to Him. If we all truly put our hearts in and surrendered our will we could truly change the world. 

Are you in?

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Regain a clear perspective....

I feel like that is what God is wanting me to do these days. He has been doing such an amazing work in my heart over the last month.

For several months now he has been telling me to be a better steward. Not only of my finances, but of everything He has blessed me with. My job, time, friends, family, health, etc. I feel that I have been doing a great job of being a better steward in all areas...but we all know God will allow trials to enter our lives in order to stretch us as individuals and make us more mature in the physical realm as well as the spiritual.

Well, Friday July 30th my income dropped over $12,000.00 year. This is a significant amount of my net income. This happening at a time when my insurance renewal is due, vehicle maintenance is rapidly approaching, the need for new tires seem to be on the horizon, and that is just expenses related to my car! Needless to say, this is one of those trials. It was extremely discouraging initially, but I have an amazing peace about it now. This peace could only come from God being that my income is now less than my expenses. However, I know that God is my provider and I will get through this.

Two to three years ago I would have allowed this trial to become a temptation with my thoughts. I would have gotten discouraged and likely gone to a bar to try to medicate with alcohol to "make it all better". I am not talking about going on a drinking spree and finding myself passed out in a gutter somewhere or waking up in the back of a truck with a new tattoo. No, not that kind of medicating. Simply going to the bar and having a few drinks which would then likely lead to a few cigarettes and too little sleep before waking up the next morning for work. Some of you may say, "What's the harm in that?" Well, as a result of those actions I would have spent money that I should be utilizing for groceries, fuel, rent, etc. It was a vicious cycle that I still sometimes wonder how I got through. Now I realize that the way out of temptation is to endure it as a trial, never allow your thoughts to turn it into a temptation by taking every thought captive, and endure all trials with joy!

So now I ask you...do you too need to regain a clear perspective of things?


Monday, August 9, 2010

Reading, Writing, and Arithmetic...

So I realize it has been a while since I have written a post. So much has happened since then. There is much to rejoice about! Will you rejoice with me?

I will start with some great things about my son Andrew. I have kind of kept him out of the blog for a while, but this is worth sharing. Recently he graduated pre-K; at that time they had a math test of 100 problems of addition and subtraction. The children were then told they had five minutes to complete as many problems as they could. Well, my son Andrew completed all 100 and got them all correct! How incredibly exciting and awesome is that! WOOOHOOOOOO! I got to talk to him about it and he spoke to me longer than he ever had previously. We must have talked for a total of fifteen minutes or more. He told me about a medal he got and then he sang to me! It was incredible. Then a couple of weeks ago when we spoke he was reading with his mother when I called. So when he got on the phone he asked if I would like for him to read to me. Almost unable to contain myself I said YES! He then proceeded to read an entire book to me with hesitation on one word. God has truly blessed his mother and I with a brilliant child! Thank you LORD!

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Breath of life...feed the fire...

Breath brings life...

God took dust from the earth and with the breath of life formed man. (Genesis 2:7) He also provided the breath of life to bring dry bones in the valley to life. (Ezekial 37:9 - 10)

Are you asking how we get the breath of life? It is easy. You read His word. It is our breath of life. It will cleanse the soul, mend the heart, strengthen us emotionally, etc. The power of the living Word is beyond limitation as we know it. It will cause a fire to burn within us, feeding our passions ans desires that are God given.

Once that fire is ignited you then need to feed the fire. One way of doing so is to live life with godly people. Keep them close and dear. Share your struggles so they can support you through prayer. Share you successes so they can rejoice and praise with you! This is one of many ways to feed the fire.

I for one am very grateful for the people I have had brought into my life through divine appointments over the last two to three months. In fact just this evening I spent several hours with some great friends. We typically have a worship/jam session on Thursdays, but we were unable to do so this week. However, instead of calling it a wash and doing our own thing we decided to meet up anyway. I am so glad we did. It was a time to share with one another where we are in life, struggles and successes. Confident leaps of faith and areas of uncertainty. Then we prayed for one another in each of those areas and as led even more. It is great to have the support both in the physical realm as well as the spiritual realm to walk through life with.

With all that being said I am off to bed now whereas I will be up and at 'em in less than six hours whereas I am leaving tomorrow for cAMPed to be a counselor for the summer youth camp. I am very excited for what God is going to do in the lives of the youth. I am blessed to be able to be a part of it as well. Until next time keep focused on Him and the power of His might, whereas He can and will provide all you need.

Saturday, June 26, 2010

False presupposition...

Do you ever find yourself boasting about future events? Yeah me too. Should we? Absolutely not. Should we faithfully plan for a better tomorrow for ourselves, our family, and friends? Absolutely. We should simply do so in humility, faith, and with much gratitude.

The reason I write this is; what if you sustain a fatal bite from a viper? I know what some of you may be saying...there are no vipers around me. Well more specifically it was a highly venomous snake that sank its fangs deep into his flesh and injected a fatal amount of poison. What did Paul do? He shook it off. Will you do the same if this occurred?

Could your viper be a devastating tornado, drunk driver hitting you, or heart failure? Let's even tone it down a notch. What if your viper is losing your job, losing your home, losing your significant other...
Will you allow that circumstance to gain control of your life or will you remain steadfast in thanking our Father for His inherent goodness?

My intention here is not to be pessimistic, but rather realistic. Ultimately we have no control of life; we exist within God's eternal plan. For example, maybe you heard about the horrific accident that the New York Giants draft pick was involved in today. He was a football and baseball star at LSU. He had previously been drafted into Major League Baseball and turned it down to pursue a football career. Two weeks ago he signed his contract after being drafted in the third round in Aprils NFL draft. Less than 48 hours from now he was going to be attending the 2010 rookie symposium and begin his life as a professional football player. Then today he almost lost his leg to amputation. Now the outcome will rely on his reaction to the circumstances.

If or when the viper bites you, will you shake it off and move forward in life with faith and joy or will you allow the poison to seep into your veins and kill you off?

Sunday, May 30, 2010

Life's lacuna...(the solution)

I want to preface this post by stating that last Tuesday was a ministry night for leaders and emergin leaders within the church. During that time Alan Smith had an amazing word for me that spoke directly to my heart at just the right time in my life. It gave me a new perspective on life in general and has been yet another turning point in my life that I can add to all the great advances that are occurring in my life over the last couple of years. 

Memorial Day Weekend, this used to be one of my favorite weekends because there were plenty of parties. For me this weekend consisted of ingesting drugs, alcohol, and likely times of being sexually immoral...oftentimes with multiple partners (or the same numerous times). Sounds fun right? Wrong! 

None of it was ever enough. Tuesday (if I even made it in that day) I would drag myself into work feeling as though Mike Tyson had his way with me in the ring. All for what? To go out again Tuesday night after work to try to fill the glaring lacuna in my life with more drugs or alcohol? A lot of the aforementioned actions have become common actions in our society and are now considered to be a part of life. It all saddens me. To top it all off these actions are slowly destroying our bodies. Not to say a healthy lifestyle does not wear on these temporary physical beings we inhabit. But, why would we want to speed the process or even increase those effects exponentially?

 This weekend the only parties I have been to were filled with worship. By surrendering in this manner I allow God to increase in my life. This has been a truly fulfilling weekend thus far without the use of drugs, alcohol, or sex. Worshiping Adonai the King of all Kings. It started out yesterday with Kari Jobe leading worship and I have to tell you the presence of the Holy Spirit was so thick in that place I had an intimate encounter with our mighty creator!

After church I went to a park in Grapevine where we celebrated a going away party for a friend of mine that has been called to go to the Philippines. It was a great time of fellowship where I met several other great people and some of those connections may very well turn into life long friendships. God is great how he brings people together in such ways. We finished off the evening with a few hours of worship. During that time we sang a song that included lyrics about increasing God and decreasing me. Again I had an incredible encounter with our God!

This morning I woke up exhausted, but not like the days of drunken debauchery and partying like there is no tomorrow ingesting toxins of all kinds into my body. No this time was different. It was an exhaustion that felt like freedom. I do not know how to put this into words so I would not expect anyone that has not had a personal encounter with God to understand. Well, let me put it this way...
as soon as I finish this post I will be going to play football with friends...does sound like a hungover, painful exhaustion/ I did not think so. I digress...anyway I woke up and began to speak confessions over my son Andrew for protection and abundant living. Listening to more praise music and yet again had an encounter that made the room thick!

What is the point of this post?

Increase God...Decrease yourself...Encounter God...

Sunday, May 23, 2010

Inundated mind...

Well, I know it has been a long time since I have posted anything here and for that I apologize. In our society, it is quite common that we get so caught up in our day to day routine that we rarely have a moment when we do not have some "important" matter inundating our minds. I too fell victim to this.
The good news is that I am now moving beyond that point! I am beginning a new season in my life. I just auspiciously moved and I am quickly getting settled into my new place. In addition to this, a lot has happened in my life over the last two and half years and I can honestly say that I am in a better place and doing better as a person than I have in well over a decade. I am looking to get back to writing more often and sharing my thoughts with you all by 'Typing Out Loud'. I hope I have not lost all my readers and hope I can grow larger whereas I feel this is a tool that I am to use to reach out to others and impact my friends, acquaintances, the community, and even the world. I pray that you are all doing well and I look forward to continuing my journey in life and sharing it with you here.

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

...His grace is all I need...

Lies, deceit, secrets, deception...

I think we can all agree that none of the aforementioned are going to lead to any positive progression in our lives. Yet we are human and our fleshiness will lead us all there at some point in our life. The key is moving on past it; not allowing those times to drag you down. You must also make a choice to turn your life around (repent) and stop those actions. You must realize that regardless of what you have done in the past you can be free and live the life you were designed to live. Oftentimes people believe that because of their past that they can never be a part of any kind of ministry or make a positive difference in the lives of those around them that they come in contact with. That is a complete and total lie.

In biblical historical times David is viewed as one of the greatest men of his time; and throughout all of history to this day. However, go read 2 Samuel 11-12. A mighty man of God, a favored king of a powerful and mighty nation, a righteous leader that was a role model for children...that lured a married women into his home, impregnated her, lied about it, tried to cover it up by using her own husband, then as a result of that plan backfiring on him essentially had her husband killed, and then married the widowed pregnant woman and tried to carry on as though nothing happened.

Eventually his lie was uncovered and his legacy would never be the same...or would it? As a result he did not continue the lie/when confronted he confessed the scandal rather than cover it up. While his confession did not  remove the consequences of his lies, it did in fact provide David with freedom from the guilt and a hope for the future. (You can find more of this in Psalm 51)

The lie that is believed is that we are so messed up that we can not come to God and do any good. Well, David's example proves otherwise and shows what God truly wants of our lives. His desire is that we confess that we are messed up which will allow Him to begin a work in us to restore us to the individuals we were created to be!

I highly recommend listening (and or watching) to this sermon from Jimmy Evans on 'Knowing God's Will For Your Life'.

...in the end instead of the words that began this post describing attributes and characteristics of yourself they can instead be:
"...love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law." (Galatians 5:22-23)

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Clothing hegemony and ominous obesity...

So this was in interesting evening. After an amazing church service kicking off the new series "The One Thing" with Vernon Wells being the guest, I proceeded upstairs to go to the Bible study as I have so many times before.  Only it was not happening tonight...LOL

So...

I proceeded to try to find something to do; it seemed as though every one had something going on. I thought I would go eat. Well, as I was driving I thought I would go check out Nordstram Rack whereas I have been told on numerous occasions it is a great place to shop. Well, I discovered a couple of things...

First, I must have horrible fashion sense. The reason I say that is because I would not wear most of the things I saw in there. I guess I am too much of a simple man for "true fashion" HAHAHA
Secondly, I had been told it was cheap (or at least more inexpensive) well from the prices I saw it must be the equivalent of a ROSS or T.J. Maxx for Bill Gates and Donald Trump. Again, I guess I am too much a simple man for "current fashion". I could buy a weeks worth of clothing for what one outfit would cost me there. I have not traveled enough to know for sure, but are we alone as a nation when it comes to this? It seems a bit ridiculous to me.

With all that having been said (or written) I am not knocking those of you who like to dress up with more current fashion, I mean most of you do look good. Anyway...moving on.

Next, I went to dinner...dinner for one. The problem is that dinner for one here in America seems to be more like dinner for two. At some point, I am thinking back in the eighties; it became a competitive advantage to have larger portions than the competitor. Well, now we are a gluttonous and fat nation (generally speaking). LOL

I'm just sayin'.

OK off my soap box for now.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Parallel posts from individuals unaware of the other....

I realize I have not posted in quite some time and it is something I trying to get worked into an extremely hectic schedule that I have had in 2010. I am in class Monday through Thursday evening and get home late. Thursday begins early for me (4:00 A.M.) so I try to get to sleep earlier. Then Friday night I try to get out and do something relaxing. Then the weekends too have been packed full of training, classes, groups, etc. I believe my schedule will loosen up here int he next few weeks. Anyway, I digress...

below are two links to two different posts from two different individuals that are not even connected in any way. However, these two posts should cause you to think and reflect more before being so quick to judge those around us. Reminds me of Philippians 2:3-4.

Check these two posts out: One by Brad, someone I went to high school with back in the day. The other by Babs, whom I do not know personally. But, she is a sister in Christ!

Sunday, January 3, 2010

Bereft of gluttony leading to satiety...

So the last month I had been under severe attack and it was a very difficult time for me to remain positive and optimistic. Well, that time is over!

Last and first of year offerings to Him and my first fruit offerings through denying and devoting (fasting) are already paying off in dividends! Whereas it was much more than I had anticipated or ever previously given up; I know that as a result I will experience a great breakthrough in an area(s) of my life as a result of my obedience.

The First Conference has been incredible this far and I look forward to the remainder of it. I wish I could take the next three days off just to focus on the devotional and The Word in preparation for the message. When pressing into Him over the last three days I am encouraged to further my actions with great fervor.

Friday, January 1, 2010

Impetuous behaviors...

Let me start by telling any and all readers happy new year. So December was a truly rocky month for me emotionally, spiritually, physically, psychologically, and physiologically. What? You think I am a mess? Well, we all are if you want to be honest with yourself. One thing I can say is that over the last year I have made huge strides to being more healthy in all the aforementioned areas and I am. However, life is a continual process of progressive sanctification and I am aware of that. I know that at this time last year and especially just 18 months ago I was doing drugs, getting drunk often, and very promiscuous to top it all off. Well, thankfully I can say those  days are behind me, but now time to work on resolving other problems...again this growth should be progressive. 


This brings me to an issue with which I have gotten much better than I was, say fifteen years ago yet still need some work in this area. Whereas my impetuous behaviors are typically good and work to better myself and those around me, there are times when it does the opposite. Even though they are rare occasions the pain inflicted upon those that are closest and dearest to me it tremendous. Kind of ironic too that as I have brought up that I am working on issues of hurting those close to me; three different friends of mine have the initial response of "no you do not".

A part of me is glad that people see me that way whereas I try to live my life in a way that can be a witness to how Jesus lived his life. But, the reality of it is that I am a mess inside. Our most righteous actions are but the equivalent of a dirty rag. The reality of it all is that I have issues like everyone else and I want to work on them to correct them, deal with them, receive the necessary healing, and move on! With that being said I am choosing now to confront these issues head on! 2010 will be a year where I experience even more freedom and stop hurting those closest to me and allow to build upon those relationships.